too much information

I'm in the breakroom having a three way convo with co-workers. The subject of piercings and tattoos came up. And then the subject of how fast the skin heals came up. And then my co-worker brought up how her skin has problems healing. It would take her a month just to get rid of the redness left by a pimple. She kept on going,telling us about her new belly button ring and how the skin around the ring probably isn't healing properly. Of course, the graphic description isn't enough. Before we know it, she stood up, pulled her shirt off her pants and showed us the belly button with the said ring with the said redness.

" It isn't infected, is it? "

It took me about five seconds to come up with a response which consists of one word.

"Um...."

Ten seconds of silence. She was saying something but I couldn't help but stare at her belly button that's right in my face. Mean, the guy who was with us was silent the whole time. I couldn't risk looking at him in fear that I might give him an icky look. It seemed an eternity before I came up with a reason.

" You're probably allergic to the jewelry. But it doesn't look alleric. It's just red. "

I hope I kept a straight face.

shallow waters

Two months more till summer. Yey!

I got an additional paycheck. This year's reward for all the stress and hard work, for enduring endless complains from idiots, for showing up to work to daydream about one final moment.

And that is to spend it.

dutch baby pancakes

Nakakagutom...

For the pancakes:

4 Tbs unsalted butter (or, if you’d prefer to try it as we did with today’s happy butter accident, try using 6-8 tablespoons, and then do not add clarified butter when serving)

4 large eggs

½ cup all-purpose flour

½ cup half-and-half

For the topping:

4 oz clarified butter (or, if you’re not into clarifying, simple melted butter will do)

Juice of 1 lemon

Powdered sugar

Preheat the oven to 425 degrees Fahrenheit. Divide the 4 Tbs butter between two 6-inch cast-iron skillets, and melt it over low heat.In a blender, whir together the eggs, flour, and half-and-half.Pour the batter into the skillets over the melted butter. Slide the skillets into the oven, and bake for 25 minutes.Remove the puffed pancakes from the oven, transfer them to a plate or shallow bowl, and pour on clarified butter, sprinkle on lemon juice, and dust with powdered sugar. Serve immediately.

-stolen from this blog-->http://orangette.blogspot.com/2005/02/9-am-sunday-butter-and-babies.html

NERD is dead

No one Ever Really Dies is dead. Apparently they didn't agree with management and so they commited suicide.

I wish I have that courage. I wish I can say that this gig isn't really all that. That I won't miss it. That I can work for some other company that won't compromise my ideals.

Too late.

fifteen minute nightmare

Every hour we get a fifteen minute break. And mostly during those fifteen minutes of peace and quiet lies boredom. There's nothing else to do. And when there's nothing else to do, time goes by so frickin' slow. You'd be wishing you were at home or somewhere else partying your fifteen minutes away.

Sure, there are couches to lie on, the telly with superb cable connection that you'd actually have something to watch even at the dead of night but nothing beats reading whatever it is that's lying about-the latest fashion mag issue, sleazy tabloids or even a reliable broadsheet.

Sounds geeky?

Anyway, I was trying to make a point here. So there I was with nothing to do about to be thrown into boredom when I spotted the day's newspaper.

Cover page: Thug-swarming-the hippest thing in the youth of now.

Second page: Teen jumped and beaten up at Central Park

Third page: Man stabbed near skytrain station

All reportedly done by teens in the lower mainland. And I bet it was because they were bored.

I'm not kidding. It's becoming a trend these days. These children would just gang up on someone and then beat them up. Even girls would join in on the fun that might result to death. And they'd probably get away with it because they are either too young to be prosecuted or nobody would rat on them.

It's the ultimate rebellion. A sheer defiance of law and morality. They'd have their bragging rights branded on tomorrow's headline.

It is scary.

magsulat ka ba naman ng ganito...

He lost. It was a close fight but he still lost. There ain't no medals for second place in this game. Even if there were, you'd still be the biggest loser. It just sucks. Knowing this, I'm kinda glad that I didn't see the match. I didn't want my boyfriend to tease me about crying over something so trivial.

O0o0O

Surfed by Resty's blog and saw his post on someone else's post.

Dyaran!

Magsulat ka ba naman ng ganito, tingnan natin kung hindi ka maging sikat. Lahat ng taong nagpapahayag ng opinyon, lalo na kung sa isang bagay na ganito kasikat, at kung ang kanyang opinyon ay taliwas sa pakiramdam ng nakakarami, talagang kontrobersiya ang kahihinatnan.

"I firmly believe that a blog should be a medium for change and a space for debate and contestation of pressing social issues that concern us and the nation."

Naks. Quote, unquote. Pakiramdam mo ba tsong celebrity ka na?

Yeah, I mean, who the fuck gives a shit what happens to you as an individual when there are more pressing matters about such as the rape and slaughter of minorities in other countries or say, the dumpsite situation in Payatas or say, the ever increasing price of fuel?

Baluktot ang aking katwiran. Pero kung lahat tayo magpapakatotoo, tama ako. Nandito tayo para sa ating mga sarili.

Sabihin mo mang makabayan ka, sabihin mo mang makatao ka, ginagawa mo pa rin ang mga bagay na ginagawa mo dahil gusto mo. Gusto mong makatulong sa iba at magkaroon ng pagbabagong nakakabuti para sa masa dahil iyon ang idinidikta ng sarili mo. Nagiging kumpleto ang iyong pagkatao sa pagsakatuparan ng kung ano man ang nararapat sa iyong palagay.

At ano ang diperensiya nito sa isang taong nagwawaldas ng panahong magsulat tungkol sa pagkaasar niya dahil nauna ang paglagay ng conditioner kaysa sa shampoo?

Katawa-tawa man, dahil kung iisipin ng ilan, talagang walang katuturang pag-isipan ang kung anong masamang pwedeng idulot ng paggamit ng conditioner bago ng shampoo, pero sa partikular na taong bumanggit noon, mahalaga sa kanya ang mga ganoong klaseng bagay.

Lahat ng tao'y may karapatang magsalita.

We're all prisoners of our own vanities.

That being said, I'm not going to give you a hard time just because you are a self-righteous preacher with chopsticks up your ass.

O0o0O

p.s.

Nananawagan ang ilang taong nakakaintindi: kailangan ng mga manunulat na may katuturan upang imulat ang mata ng karamihang bulag dahil sa pagkabangag sa sarili.

in your face

My teeth were grinding against each other as I chewed on the sweetened ham. The happy cloud that passed over me when I saw that, for once, breakfast at work was edible suddenly turned grey.

Why?

Because I just learned that due to 'us' dealers getting back our twenty five percent share of tips from the guest services people, they are getting a two dollar raise. Which makes their starting wage $11 per hour.

When I heard that rumor, I almost choked.

That had got to be the shittiest improvement this casino has ever done. They raised everybody's wages except that of the dealers. Guest services only amount to fifty employees and that includes their managers and supervisors. To give them a two dollar raise would be nothing to the company. Compare that to over five hundred dealers and supervisors. That's a shitload of money every month.

We are the lowest paid employees in this casino and the ones that get the most shit from customers. You'd think the company would give us compensation for that. No, they think tips are enough.

Fuck that!

Tips are shared by everybody. The management imposed that rule. They promised every newly hired employee that they'd get a cut. They didn't even ask the dealers for their opinion if they wanted to share it. To think that we, dealers, are the ones that are out there, licking the customer's boot at every turn of the card just to have that one dollar in the end. To think that we, dealers, have to swallow that so-called-pride because we know it will be worth it.

Now, when they give everybody a raise except us, how are we to go about our work with enthusiasm knowing that we only get paid the lowest amount possible? Customer service? What the fuck is that? Let that guest services attendant handle it. After all, they are getting paid for that shit, aren't they?

tsismis!

Ang mga Pinoy talaga, mahilig sa tsismis!

Siyempre kabilang na ko sa sambayanan ng chisms.

At heto ang latest sa mga nagbabagang balita.

Manager, nakikipaglandian sa isang dealer.

At boom!

Magsiyota na daw sila!

Grabe. Ang masama pa doon, Pinay yung manager. Hindi naman isyu yung mga twenty years na pagitan nila sa edad. Ang isyu doon mga kaibigan, eh, pinagtatakpan niya yung mga kamalian nitong dealer na 'to. Nasuspende na nga raw ang naturang manager dahil sa hindi niya pagpasok para lamang maka-date hetong si lalaking dealer.

Ang isyu dito, nagpapakatanga siya. Hindi na na niya inisip ang hirap na dinaanan niya para lamang makarating sa posisyon niya ngayon. At paano na lang kung ginagamit lang siya ng lalaki para makapasa sa probation? Paano na lang kung masisante siya?

Ewan ko na lang.

Lahat ba ng umiibig nabobobo? Konting kilig lang, nagka-brain damage na.

maniacal

You and your maniacal...thing. There's no such word as 'manayakal'!

Yes, they were arguing again about silly little maniacal things that wouldn't really matter and pretty soon, she'd be pissed and pinch him on his side.

Bloody hell, I understand how words are when I see them but I can't understand them when I hear them. Oh well.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Though some patrons can get grumpy and cranky and downright crazy, I've never wished anyone of them to be dead so that they'd stop coming to our casino. Except this single old guy.

He is okay but he creeps me out.

So yeah, I hope he'd fly back to China or get married to a dominatrix of a wife/husband who'll tie him down to bed each night so he won't come to my office.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Why can't Itunes Canada have a copy of Reise,Reise by Rammstein? I had to go snooting around the UK site for it and then they won't even let me buy the damn album!

Make me go old school on my ass why doncha? I'd hate to go to the store just to grab a copy and then burn it into my Ipod.

Hmm, maybe being this lazy will pay off with pounds. I meant flesh not currency.

somebody else got fired

Guilt takes over every time. As well as that certain familiar feeling, that one little voice in my head that says " Hey, we got away with it". Or did I?

I've been dreading going to work, or talking to one of the managers. I didn't want to see them or them to talk to me, fearing they'd tell me I'm not working today and that I should never come back.

That happened to one of my acquaintances. I don't know if he really wants to be fired or what, but I think something inside him really snapped. He is a fairly nice guy, soft-spoken as far as I know. Maybe he just couldn't handle it anymore. Or maybe it got into his head, that he is a good dealer, that he is one of the supervisor's friends, that he is untouchable.

As for me, I'm still working. My name's still on the schedule for two weeks and hopefully, nobody would tell me to "fuck off" in a diplomatic manner.

+-+-+-+-+-+-+

Saturday came and went and then I went to the club again. Paulette, one of my co-workers, dragged me to go out with her and other friends. We went to Luce's. I thought it'd be one of those seedy clubs but when we were inside, I was smiling. I'm giving it a ten for swankiness. The place is certainly posh, one of the best clubs I've been in when it came to the interior.

However, I had to ask this when midnight came- where's your groove at? Usually, midnight's the turning point. That's the time when people are tipsy enough to go crazy on the dance floor. But the poshly dressed crowd just stood there and swayed to the music.

An hour or so after, Paulette and I were already bored. Time to hit the poker room. It's been months since I tried to blend into the scene and I realized I didn't miss it at all.

+-+-+-+-+-+-+

Poker is my life. Even on my days off, it seems like I can't get enough of it. And it's not only me. The virus has spread and my co-workers are as sick as me.

We spent Sunday at Ryan's house battling against each other for a few dollars. I came in second at our mini-tournament. We went at it again for five dollars and this time, yours truly took it all. I was lucky that night.

engot

I really feel stupid today.

Really, really stupid.

I could have done something that might get me fired or make others see me in a different light. Anyway, it's really stupid.

This could be the turning point of my life.

The thing is, I had dreams about staying in that casino and then growing old and then becoming a poker manager or just a supervisor (depending if tips are that good). I don't want to get fired. I don't want to look for another job where I know I will just get bored (except maybe for a job in fashion but hell, that gig seems light years away).

I really hope I won't get fired...

...maybe I'm just making a fuzz about nothing. I hope it will be nothing.

I really really really hope it will be nothing.